Weaning. That’s what is on my mind. I have been breastfeeding for over a year now and I’m ready for it to be over. If you’re an “extended breastfeeder,” you get props from me. I can’t do it, and I don’t want to do it. I want my daughter to drink cows milk exclusively now. And, yet, she has other ideas.
Daughter #1 was never a big breast feeder. I weaned her around a year with no problems. She could have seemingly cared less. It was as if she was saying, “Oh, you want me to drink out of this cup now? And you want me to drink this other kind of milk? Okay. Whatever floats your boat.” And so I didn’t think it would be a big deal this time around.
Well. Not so. This daughter has always loved breast feeding and does not seem at all interested or motivated in weaning. This past week I tried only breast feeding her in the morning and at night, before bed. Well. That wasn’t going to fly in her book. She was a holy mess. She screamed. And screamed. And screamed. I couldn’t put her down. It was not pretty. So I gave in.
I’m sure it doesn’t help that she’s cutting both her top teeth right now. Or that she’s tiny and doesn’t eat all that much. I desperately want to stop breast feeding and I also desperately want to be the mom she needs me to be.
My plan is to try and keep cutting back and hope that she decides that cows milk isn’t so bad. At this point I feel very frustrated and conflicted. Unless you are, or have ever been a breast feeding mom, you can’t possibly understand just how personal and emotional the decision how and when to wean is. I think we’re all just trying to do the right thing for ourselves and our children. I know I am.